MY "BIG DAY" AT THE INAUGURATION CELEBRATION OF MY BUDDY BOBBY JINDAL AS GOVERNOR OF THE GREAT STATE OF LOUISIANA!

I’ve been promising y’all for awhile that I would tell you about my “Big Day.” So here it is. This is a long tale. The Mrs. tried to convince me to break it up in chapters so nobody would fall asleep reading it. But it's just so full in me that I need to get it all out. If you don't have time to read it just move on down the page, and wait until bedtime for this, and it'll help you drift on off.

MY TRIP TO THE INAUGURATION OF MY BUDDY BOBBY JINDAL AS GOVERNOR OF THE GREAT STATE OF LOUISIANA

Preface: The Friday before my good buddy Bobby Jindal was to be inaugurated as Governor of the great State of Louisiana he called me up and asked me if I would come down to Baton Rouge and stand up with him at his swearing in…kind of like a “Best Man” deal. I asked him if Kathleen Blanco was going to be there, and he said that she was, but that I didn’t have to socialize with her. So I told him I would come down and help him out.

I had told Bobby a day or two before that my truck wasn’t running good, so he told me “Andy, I am going to send you a Greyhound Bus ticket to Baton Rouge by FederalExpress. I really want you to be here to share this fabulous moment with me and Supriya (that‘s his wife).” And would you believe that on the next day a ticket shows up by FederalExpress, just like Bobby said it would. I swear, if Bobby tells you something, it’s gonna happen!

Getting to Baton Rouge can be harder than you think.

So on Monday morning (real early), the Mrs. pumped me down to the Greyhound terminal and left me off. She didn’t let on like she was excited as me, but I think she was.

Now it has been a long time since I took a flight on Greyhound, and things have sure changed since then. I went into the station, and looked up on the board, and saw that the bus was leaving at 6:00 AM for Baton Rouge. Well, I was there plenty early, so I breathed a sigh of relief. The nice black lady at the counter showed me what bus was going to Baton Rouge and I went on over there and give my ticket to the man taking up tickets. A funny look came across his face right away. Then he said “Sir, you are going to have to wait to board. This ticket is a “Standby Ticket.” I told him “I don’t mind standing up on the bus all the way to Baton Rouge, because my good buddy Bobby Jindal is expecting me to be there for his inauguration as Governor.” The fellow kind of looked at me funny…don’t know why.

Then this fellow explained to me that if all the seats were took up on the bus that I would have to wait for the next one. Well, I told him that it was too important to our Governor Elect Bobby Jindal…but he acted like he didn’t care too much. So I set down and waited. Ooooh, you should see some of the funny-looking people that were going down to Baton Rouge. There were several funny-looking white folks, several Mexicans, and several black fellows and gals, and several folks that I couldn’t tell what they were getting on that bus. There was this one big old white lady that was so big that she barely could get through the door and up the steps. I was thinking to myself “I sure hope she don’t take up two seats and knock me down to the next bus.“

But about 5 minutes before the bus was to leave, the ticket man come over to me and said “Go on ahead and board. It looks like there is going to be plenty of room.” I’ll tell you, if he was a girl, I would have kissed him smack on the mouth. I was so happy!
I was on my way!!!

Here is the bus taking me to the inauguration of Bobby Jindal.

Then right before time for the bus to pull out here come a big bunch of Mexicans…I mean a big bunch of them. There was two grown ladies, four little girls, and one boy about 10 years old trapesing up onto the bus. The children were carrying grocery sacks, and the oldest little girl was carrying a watermelon. I found out later that they had brought their lunch, seeing as Greyhound don't feed you on the flight to Baton Rouge.

Well, they finally all found a seat near the back of the bus close to me. (I had set at the back of the bus because I seen that was where the potty was, and I was so excited that I was afraid I might turn loose some water and didn‘t want to run over nobody getting to the potty).

Well the bus took off, and I was in Heaven. I could barely wait to see the look on Bobby’s face when I got there. So we rode on down I-49 a good way and I got to wondering about all these Mexican folks .

So I started talking to one of the grown ladies and right off I could tell that she could only talk Mexican. But fortunately the little boy could talk American real good. So I asked him what his name was, and he told me “Hay-sus.” I had never really known somebody named Hay-sus, so I asked him how did you spell it. And he told me J-E-S-U-S. Well, I was proud to know that these Mexican people had spelled the name of their son after the Savior, so I figured they must be Christian.

Now Jesus knew how to talk both American and Mexican, so he sort of interrupted between me and his Momma (Maria), and his Aunt Consuela (the other grown lady was his aunt Consuela). The other little girls were his sisters and cousins. So I asked them if they was going down to Baton Rouge for the inauguration, but they didn’t know nothing about it. No, it seems that they were going down past Baton Rouge to Angola, LA. From what I could tell, Maria and Consuela’s husbands had gotten a job working on a farm down there and they went to visit them every other month or so. I asked Jesus how long his Daddy, and uncle was gonna be working there. He jabbered something in Mexican to his Momma…she jabbered something back, and then he told me “10 to 20.”

Well, we had passed Alexandria on I-49 by this time, and all the sudden the bus just started rattling something awful. It was weaving, and banging. I was thinking to myself, “the first thing I’m gonna tell Bobby to do once he takes office is to fix this dad-blamed I-49.” But it was not the road giving the problem, it was the bus. I could smell a real bad odor…like something was burning, and the bus driver come over the megaphone, and told everybody to sit down and buckle up their seat belts. So we did. By the time the turbulence passed, our Greyhound bus was limping into a rest area near Exit 48.

The bus driver told us on the megaphone to get on out and stretch out legs since the bus was smoking real bad…truthfully we all needed to stretch our legs. So after we got off the bus at the rest area, I asked Jesus if I could take a picture of his family. They all said “Okay!”

Here are my bus-mates to Baton Rouge - Maria, Consuela, and their daughters Maria, Consuela, Consuela, Maria, and Maria's son Jesus.

Well it didn’t look good at all with smoke coming out of the engine of that bus, so I went up to talk to the driver, and he told me that Greyhound was sending another bus along to take us on to Baton Rouge. But terror struck in my heart when he told me that it was going to be about two hours until it got there. I began to explain to this bus driver that it just wouldn’t do. “I’ve got to be in Baton Rouge before one, because I’m supposed to stand up with Bobby Jindal at his inauguration as Governor of the Great State of Louisiana” I told him. Well, he looked at me like I had an extra antler. I told him, “if it’s gonna be two hours, then count me out! I’ll get to Baton Rouge on my own!”

I saw that they had a pay phone there at the rest area, and I asked one of my bus-mates if they could “break a one,” since I didn’t have any change. He did. I called Bobby’s cell phone number and began to explain to him how the bus had broken down below Alexandria on I-49. He was heartstruck. Then he began to give me a 48-point-plan on how to fix the bus myself and get her rolling (Bobby’s that way…once he sees a problem, he’ll resolve it to death). But I told him that the bus driver had told me to keep my hands off the engine of that bus, and I was just stuck there.

So I had an idea. I asked Bobby could he call the Louisiana State Police and get a State Trooper to come pick me up and take me to Baton Rouge? Bobby didn’t say nothing for awhile, then he said, “Andy, that is an excellent plan. The only problem is that I am not yet Governor. I won’t be until after I am sworn in today. And I'm not really sure that would be an ethical use of my office. But I would be more than happy to ask current Governor Kathleen Blanco if she would help us with this matter.” When I heard Bobby mention that old bitty, I almost hollered at him. I told him, “I don’t want neither you nor me to owe that worthless excuse for a Governor anything.” I told him, “I’ll get there eventually on my own. I might not make it for the Inauguration, but I’ll make it for the Inaugural Ball for sure.” Bobby seemed real disappointed, but understood (he’s Christian, and understands that things happen).

So I told him, “Y’all go on ahead and start without me. But one things for sure buddy, I ain’t gonna let you down.” About then my 3 minutes on the pay phone ran out and the line went dead.

I didn’t know what to do, so I just started walking south on I-49 toward Lafayette, praying that God would send me an Angel. And He did. I had walked no more than a couple of miles when a fellow pulled up in a pickup and asked me where I was going, and if I needed a lift? He introduced himself as Calhoun Bastienne. Now I knew he was a Coonass right off, due to his name, but I had no idea that he was both Coonass and RedNeck (I found that out later). So I told him I was headed to Baton Rouge, and I would love a ride. He said he was only going as far as Opelousas, but to “hop in.” Man, did we have a big time visiting! I told him all about where I was going, and what I was doing. He seemed real interested, though he did sort of weave off the Interstate a time or two while I was talking.

But we finally got to Opelousas, and he said, “well, this is where we split up Buddy.” I had asked him if he knew somewhere that I could use a computer and a telephone. I needed to use a computer to get a computer letter prayer request out to everybody for help from God to get to Baton Rouge, and a telephone to call Bobby and let him know my progress. Well, Calhoun told me he knew a fellow that owned a filling station there in Opelousas. He was a real nice fellow that had been in the Air Force in Viet Nam, and had a computer and a telephone at his station. So Calhoun left me off at his friends' filling station and took me in and introduced me to the owner, and waved me a happy goodbye. I asked Calhoun if I could take his picture before he left, and he said, “Okay.”

My "Angel" Calhoun Bastienne

Well, this fellow that owned this service station was real nice, but kind of odd. He had been in the Air Force, and the walls were all covered with pictures of airplanes, and helicopters, and he had little model planes hanging from the ceiling on strings. Oh, I forgot...I took a picture of his filling station, because it's (let me get my word book...) unique.


Well anyway, this fellow was real nice, and when I explained to him my situation he told me that I could use his computer in the office right behind the beer cooler, and the cricket box. So I went on back in there and sent out a computer call for prayer from all of you. Ooohhh, you shoulda seen some of the stuff that was on that old boy's computer...sort of made me blush. But it was a port in the storm for me. And I want to tell y'all that the prayers worked.

I had tried to call Bobby's cell phone, but he must have had it turned off since it was about swearing in time. So I went on out front and just stood there hoping for help from the Lord. And here it come!

This big old rig hauling something or another with a bunch of black fellows sitting on top pulled up right there at the station. Them fellows jumped off, and out of the cab come this old black fellow. He walked straight up to me, stuck out his hand, and said, "I am Johnson Jackson Jefferson Johnson, but most people just call me Johnson Johnson." I shook his hand and said, "Pleased to meet you, my name is..." And before I could finish old Johnson Johnson said, "Your name is Andy, and the Lord has sent me here today to help you."

Well, I have always believed in miracles, and Angels, but this was overcoming to me. I swear I started blubbering like a baby. Then Johnson Johnson asks me what he can do to help. I was so overcome with the glory of this all that I was afraid to ask for much. But I figure if the Lord had sent this old boy to help me out then I'd better not "ask small." So I told Johnson Johnson, "you can help me out by carrying me to the River Center in Baton Rouge for the Inaugural Ball of Governor Jindal." "No problem," says Johnson Johnson. "Just let me run in here and get these boys some Honey Buns and root beer and we'll be on our way." I was stunned and overcome!

My second "Angel" - Johnson Jackson Jefferson Johnson

Johnson Jackson Jefferson Johnsons' rig and the boys I rode to Baton Rouge with

Well, Johnson Johnson told me that he couldn't take his rig on the Interstate, so we was gonna have to take Hwy 190 on in to Baton Rouge from Opelousas. It was fine with me. So I hopped up on top with the boys and away we went. Now Hwy 190 is the old route to Baton Rouge, and you gotta stop in a bunch of little towns, and truthfully I don't think Johnson Johnsons' rig could make over about 25 anyway. So it was a long ride. But just about sundown, we pulled into Baton Rouge, and Johnson Johnson drove me right one block away from the River Center and left me off. I hopped down and tried to give him money for the gas, but he wasn't having none of that. He said it was his joy to obey the Lord. So I asked him if I could pay for the Honey Buns and root beer and he said I could if it would make me feel better. So I did, and it did. I give him a big hug and he drove off. That is one wonderful man!

Well, I stopped and took a picture of the River Center where the Inaugural Ball was being held before I went in. It's a beautiful building.

Baton Rouge River Center - Site of my "Big Night"

Well I head on around front and start to go in, but these two big State Troopers are standing there at the door. So they ask to see my invitation. Well, I don't have an invitation, so I just tell them that my good buddy Bobby Jindal had called Friday and invited me to come. They seemed (let me get my word book...) dubious at my assertion. The big one told me "Get on out of here. Nobody gets in here without an invitation." So I told him, "you don't understand, Bobby is gonna be upset if I don't get in there." So he says, "No invitation, no entrance."

So I had an idea. I pulled out the stub from my bus ticket and showed it to him, and started telling him how Bobby had sent me this Standby Bus Ticket just to come for his inauguration, and asked him if that would do for an invitation. He was not impressed. Well just about the time he was about to cuff me I heard a big old ruckus. That trooper turned around, and here come Bobby running through the atrium of the River Center just shouting "Andy, Andy, you finally made it, you finally made it!"

Bobby ran up to me and threw his arms around me (well, not all the way around me...he's a real little fellow and can't reach all the way around hardly anybody), hugged me, and lead me on in to sit down at his table. Ooooh, did I have a good time. I got to visit with Former Governors Dave Treen, Buddy Roemer, and Mike Foster. Kathleen Blanco was there, but I didn't speak to her. The only living ex-Governor that wasn't there was Edwin Edwards (he's kind of occupied for about 5 more years). But it was nice.

They had good food and champagne, and punch, and crawfish, and just about anything you would want. I visited with Senator Mary Landrieu a while, and told her what a lying piece of crud she was. She had been drinking a little heavy, and agreed wholeheartedly with me. That was nice. Then I visited with Senator David Vitter (I'm not sure who that woman was that was with him though). But we had a good talk about things. That was nice.

When it came time for Bobby and Supriya to make their big entrance, we all lined up and clapped for them. It was real regal and royal. I was overcome by the pageantry of it all.

Bobby and Supriya making their "big entrance."

So after Bobby come in and set down with me and Dave, and Mike, and Buddy, and Kathleen at his table the music started and folks went to dancing, and just having a big old ball. Now Kathleen Blanco was a little glum about not being Governor anymore, so she was really "throwing 'em down," if you know what I mean. But I'll be danged, the more she drank, the nicer she got. Now she knows that I don't care much for her, but by the time she was stone drunk she had asked me to dance. I told her that I was sorry, but I was pretty tired, and I had forgot to bring my dancing shoes anyway. She was disappointed, but she went on and danced with Congressman William Jefferson from New Orleans instead. He's a good dancer. He's got rythm.

Well, it came time for Bobby to go up on the stage and speak to the crowd. And Bobby turned to me and said, "Andy, I feel so badly that you weren't able to stand with me at the Inauguration. Would you please accompany me to the podium? It would mean a lot to me to have a close friend stand with me." Well, I couldn't let the boy down. So I handed my camera to Kathleen Blanco, and asked her to take a couple of pictures. And away we went to the podium.

Me with my buddy Bobby Jindal speaking

Me clowning around with my Buddy Bobby while he's speaking.

Well, the evening finally wore down, and it got time for me to get on home, so I thanked Bobby for everything, and told him to stop in when he was up north. But to be sure to keep sending me computer letters when he has time for sure. I know he's gonna be pretty busy now as Governor, so it might not be the same between us as before. But that's just life.

So, I went out into the chilly night and took a cab to the Greyhound Station, and rode on back home. There wasn't really much to tell about the ride home. It was (let me get my word book...) uneventful. I got into Shreveport, called the Mrs., and she came and picked me up.

It was about 3:00 a.m. in the morning, and I was tired. But it was almost time to get up and go to work, so I just stayed up. I'll tell you I don't think I could have slept anyhow. It was one of the most glorious events I have had (in the last few years anyway).

I'll tell you one thing though, I'm gonna get my truck running good before the Inauguration in 2012. No more Greyhound flights for this old boy!

Well, I need to close this out by giving glory to The Lord! He helped me every step of the way, and His Saints and Angels done their part, too. If I ever doubted His promises...well...shame on me!