QUOTES

I promise y'all I'll get this all out of my system today! But I found some quotes about football that I thought you might enjoy looking at.

Football is, after all, a wonderful way to get rid of your aggressions without going to jail for it. ~Heywood Hale Brown

Before Super Bowl XIII: "He [Bradshaw] is so dumb, he couldn't spell cat if you spotted him a C and an A." - Thomas (Hollywood) Henderson

Hey, I' might be dumb, but I'm not stupid - Terry Bradshaw

When Brian told me he grew up in New Mexico, I told him I thought it is cool that people from other countries play football. - Terry Bradshaw

Most football players are temperamental. That's 90 percent temper and 10 percent mental. ~Doug Plank

“He doesn't know the meaning of the word fear, but then again he doesn't know the meaning of most words” - Bobby Bowden

After the Bucs broke their 26-game losing streak - "Three or four plane crashes and we're in the playoffs." - John McKay

At a post-game press conference in 1976 "You guys don't know the difference between a football and a bunch of bananas." The following week after a media member had dropped off a case of bananas at his door - "You guys don't know the difference between a football and a Mercedez-Benz."- John McKay

After a particularly heavy loss - "The bus leaves in an hour - anyone who needs a shower, take one." - John McKay

If "ifs" and "buts" were candy and nuts, life would be a piece of cake. (?) - Don Meredith

“I'm not much of a golfer, I don't have any friends and, all I like to do is go home and be alone, and worry about ways not to lose.” - Bear Bryant

“When you get in the endzone, act like you've been there before.” - Bear Bryant

Let's face it, you have to have a slightly recessive gene that has a little something to do with the brain to go out on the football field and beat your head against other human beings on a daily basis. ~Tim Green


You have to play this game like somebody just hit your mother with a two-by-four. ~Dan Birdwell


Football combines the two worst things about America: it is violence punctuated by committee meetings. ~George F. Will


Pro football is like nuclear warfare. There are no winners, only survivors. ~Frank Gifford


Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence. ~Erma Bombeck


If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. ~Erma Bombeck


If you're mad at your kid, you can either raise him to be a nose tackle or send him out to play on the freeway. It's about the same. ~Bob Golic


At the base of it was the urge, if you wanted to play football, to knock someone down, that was what the sport was all about, the will to win closely linked with contact. ~George Plimpton


Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field? ~Jim Bouton


One of the great disappointments of a football game is that the cheerleaders never seem to get injured. ~Author Unknown


American football makes rugby look like a Tupperware party. ~Sue Lawley, 1985


Football is not a contact sport. It's a collision sport. Dancing is a good example of a contact sport. ~Duffy Daugherty


When I went to Catholic high school in Philadelphia, we just had one coach for football and basketball. He took all of us who turned out and had us run through a forest. The ones who ran into the trees were on the football team. ~George Raveling


The reason women don't play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public. ~Phyllis Diller



I do not like football, which I think of as a game in which two tractors approach each other from opposite directions and collide. Besides, I have contempt for a game in which players have to wear so much equipment. Men play basketball in their underwear, which seems just right to me. ~Anna Quindlen, Living Out Loud, 1988


College football is a sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture. ~Elbert Hubbard


Watching football is like watching pornography. There's plenty of action, and I can't take my eyes off it, but when it's over, I wonder why the hell I spent an afternoon doing it. ~Luke Salisbury

There are two kinds of people in the world, Notre Dame lovers and Notre Dame haters. And, quite frankly, they're both a pain in the ass. ~Dan Devine, former Notre Dame football coach



I have seen women walk right past a TV set with a football game on and - this always amazes me - not stop to watch, even if the TV is showing replays of what we call a "good hit," which is a tackle that causes at least one major internal organ to actually fly out of a player's body. ~Dave Barry


I like to believe that my best hits border on felonious assault. ~Jack Tatum


He was the only man I ever saw who ran his own interference. ~Steve Owen, about Bronko Nagurski


Trying to maintain order during a legalized gang brawl involving 80 toughs with a little whistle, a hanky and a ton of prayer. ~Anonymousreferee, explaining his job



When it comes to football, God is prejudiced - toward big, fast kids. ~Chuck Mills



Football players, like prostitutes, are in the business of ruining their bodies for the pleasure of strangers. ~Merle Kessler


Speed, strength, and the inability to register pain immediately. ~Reggie Williams, when asked his greatest strengths as a football player


Rugby is a beastly game played by gentlemen. Soccer is a gentleman's game played by beasts. Football is a beastly game played by beasts. ~Henry Blaha, 1972