I have purposely found many things to do today (make-work for myself stuff)...clean the mini-blinds...wash and vacuum the car...cut grass...pretty well anything to help me process in my mind the current situation.
I think it was Henry David Thoreau that said, "I never trust thoughts that come to me while sitting down." That might not be the quote exactly, but the drift is the same. I come to conclusions much better while I am on my feet (either walking, jogging, mowing, etc.). Idle hands are "the devils' workshop." I have always found that I think more clearly while accomplishing some task...even if I end up messing up the "task," I can work out stuff in my head.
So I chose tasks I couldn't mess up...but still get the desired "alone with my thoughts" thing.
My third son is 18 years old, and is one unique cat. Now, all my sons are very bright, but at the risk of hurting any of their feelings, I believe that #3 is, if not the sharpest, definitely the most aggressive. He graduates from high school in about a month. He has earned his standard Louisiana TOPS scholarship which pays tuition at any University in the State.
He has already earned 12 semester hours while in high school for his advanced English classes, and two college classes he completed in his sophomore, and junior years. His ACT scores were stunning...making a perfect score on one section, and near perfect on others.
He's a hard worker. He manages an ice cream shop now, while going to school. He has always mowed lawns for people. He never asks us for a penny. He bought his first truck himself, and bought a new motorcycle not long ago. He has the potential to do anything.
Today, he enlisted in the U.S. Navy. He is going to compete to be a Navy SEAL.
Now, I am a "man of peace, with a great appreciation for warriors." (hereafter referred to as "a chicken!") He is "self-motivated." That means that no one else can motivate him to do anything he doesn't want to...and no one can stop him from doing what he does want to. (hereafter referred to as "stubborn!")
I wanted him to go to college. I tried to convince him that the time would go fast, and he would go into the military as an officer. But he is ready to get in the fight, and no amount of suggestion, cajoling, exhortation, etc. is going to stop him.
On one hand, I am disappointed...but I should have seen it coming. From his earliest days as a little boy he has had a fascination with knives, and guns, and weaponry of any kind. He's got two handguns, and a rifle...and he's a pretty fair shot. He wrestled in high school, and though not what you would call a "star," he was full of grit and gravel. He was small, but in this last year he has gotten much bigger...more muscular...become a man.
His whole life, if there was anything dangerous, or crazy...he was first in line to try it...and he gave it his all!
On the other hand, I am so proud of him that it brings a tear to this old chickens' eye. It is humbling to see a kid at 18 that knows exactly what he wants to do...to kill the enemies of freedom...not just win a war against them...to kill them. He wants to be a SEAL. Now, some would argue, but there are no tougher, smarter, more well prepared humans in the world than Navy SEALs. And that is all he wants to be...the toughest, smartest, best prepared warrior on the planet.
Over the last several weeks, he took the military entrance test...almost aced it (I kidded with him, asking what error they had on the test...he laughed), and has met with a SEAL. He got the "thumbs up" from the SEAL trainer, and will be working personally with him for the next 6 months.
He will be spending alot of time on the track, on the roads, lifting weights, and a whole lot of time in the pool. The Navy has a deal with the Downtown Y, and he'll have access to their olympic-size swimming pool. From what I understand, he's going to grow fins from all the pool time.
After 6 months, he will go on to Great Lakes, and if he makes the cut there, he will go to SEAL training...where I understand that about 75% of the candidates quit. He has told me, "I won't quit. They will have to carry me out dead, or tell me I'm not good enough. But I won't quit." (not the exact quote, but that's the jist of it) And I know the man well enough to know he's right.
Even though I really don't want him in the danger that SEALs encounter every day, I would be very disappointed for him if he can't cut it. But he doesn't care if he dies while trying...it's all he wants to do. He has told me that if he doesn't "go for it," he'll regret it the rest of his life. He's hard to argue with...because that is true...and I don't want any of my boys to go out of this life with any regrets.
The aggravating part of this whole thing is that I'm apprehensive, and he's not! He is perfectly at peace with it, and this old chicken is fighting many emotions. I know I've rambled on a long time here, but just writing it down has helped a whole lot.
Heck...I'm proud! I'm proud of him, and proud for him. He's willing to go do what I'd be too chicken to even attempt. He's a good man...Americas' best...y'all pray for him please, and for all our men and women that wear the uniform.
I'm not bummed out...I'm happy! I'm happy to have a son with a firm direction in his life.
Oh, by the way, he leaves here on Sept. 11...
Now I have a son in the Air Force (extremely proud of him, too), and one in the Navy. Heck, I might try to join up with the Coast Guard...no wait, I can't swim very good, and am afraid of sharks...never mind.
Shoot...I'm proud of all my boys. No man could have been blessed to have three finer men, and one sweeter boy as sons as I have. The Mrs. threw a good litter for sure!
I came across a funny while studying the SEALs the last few weeks.
U.S. NAVY SEALS...
IRANIAN NAVY SEALS
I'm reading "Lone Survivor" by Marcus Luttrell. If you have any interest in what it takes to become a SEAL, and what they do, pick it up...it's worth a read.
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