LOST!!!

When I saw this article on FoxNews, I got tickled.

GPS Typo Leads Couple 400 Miles Off Course

ROME — Officials say a Swedish couple looking for the pristine waters of the popular island of Capri ended some 400 miles (660 kilometers) away in the northern industrial town of Carpi after misspelling the destination on their car's GPS.

Angelo Giovannini, a spokesman for the Carpi town hall, near Modena, said Tuesday the couple drove into the main square last week and asked the local tourist office how to reach Capri's famed Blue Grotto sea cave.

Giovannini said "we thought they might mean a restaurant. Capri is an island, they did not even wonder why they didn't cross any bridge or take any boat."

This Giovannini cat makes a good point. You would think that somebody would expect a bridge, or a ferry to reach an island. Ignorant....

It reminded me of the time that I was filling up at the Valero Gas Station on Benton Road, and this old pickup truck with Arkansas license plates and about 7 people in the cab pulled up next to me.

Arkie: "Hey buddy, you from around here?"

Me: "Yep."

Arkie: "We just come down Hwy 3 from Arkansas, and I think we're lost. Can you tell me how to get to Bossier City?"

(Now, before I go on, I must tell you that when you come south on Hwy 3 from Arkansas to Bossier City, at the city limits, there is an enormous sign that says, "Welcome To Bossier City!" Then, as you proceed down Hwy 3 to where this Arkie currently was, you pass "North Bossier Autoplex," the "Bossier City Civic Center," the "Bossier Library," and the "Pierre Bossier Mall.")

Me: (trying not to laugh) "Well partner, you are in Bossier City."

Arkie: (with a satisfied look on his face) "Really?" (to the crowd in the truck) "See, I told y'all I could get us here!"

Arkie: "So, can you tell me how to get to the airport?"

Me: "Sure, just take that ramp right there on to I-20 West, cross the Red River bridge into Shreveport, take the Monkhouse Drive Exit, and follow the big signs to the airport. You can't miss it."

Arkie: "No, I don't mean the Shreveport airport, I mean the Bossier City airport."

Me: "Wellsir, there ain't a Bossier City airport."

Arkie: (looking skeptical) "You sure?"

Me: "Lived here 49 years...trust me, there ain't a Bossier City airport."

So, he got out of the truck and walked inside the Valero. I saw him through the window talking to the cute little black gal that works there for a while, and then come back out.

Arkie: "Well, she backs you up on it! I guess there ain't an airport in Bossier City. Now, I don't know what to do. I was supposed to meet up with my nephew at the West Gate of the Airport in just a little while."

Me: (eyebrows raised as realization takes hold) "Partner, is your nephew in the Air Force?"

Arkie: (chest puffed out & smiling) "Dang right he is! And we're all danged proud of him, too!"

Me: "Are you sure you ain't looking for the Air Force Base, instead of an airport? I mean, there is a West Gate at Barksdale."

Arkie: "Barksdale! Yeah, he said the airport was on Barksdale! Can you tell me where that is?"

(My Christianity kicked in about that time, and I realized that somebody this stupid might end up in Jefferson, TX without some help.)

Me: "I don't live too far from it. Why don't you just follow me, and I'll point to it when it's time for you to turn left to the West Gate of Barksdale."

Arkie: "Man, I shore appreciate it!"

Me: "Now, you're gonna have to stay right behind me, because when we go up on that ramp right there we've got to take a loop that's gonna put us onto Barksdale Blvd. And if you miss which ramp, you'll end up on I-20 West, headed to Shreveport."

Arkie: "Okay!"

So, away we go...pull on to Benton Road...traffic light turns green...head up the ramp...look in my rearview mirror...Arkie truck stalled at intersection...7 cars behind me now, no way to wait on him...take the loop onto Barksdale Blvd, find a place to hang a U...head back around to hook back up with Arkie...get to the intersection...Arkie gone.

Maybe when he got about 20 miles down I-20 and saw that big "Welcome To Texas" sign, he figured out he ain't in Bossier City anymore. You know, some folks are just too dumb to help.