DON'T TELL ME ALL REDNECKS ARE IGNURANT!

I have always loved old people. I don't know why, but I have a special affection for old folks.

So this old Redneck buddy of mine in Vicksburg, Mississippi (Clevis) sent me a computer letter. Here it is:

Hey Andy,

As you know, my knees have just worn completely out. I'm having a terrible time trying to get around these days. Heck, everything is wearing out. I've got bladder problems, and bowel problems.

So I went to Doc Cummings, and asked him about knee replacement surgery. I also asked him about doing something about my bowels and bladder. He was real sympathetic to my situation, but told me that Medicare won't pay for none of those surgeries for me, seeing as I never had paid no Medicare tax. I don't think he was telling me truthfully. I think he just didn't want to do the paperwork.

So I asked him what Medicare would pay for that might help me out. Well, he told me that they might buy me a scooter to get around on (you know, like at Wal-Mart, or the gambling boats). He gave me a phone number to call "The Scooter Store."

So I called up The Scooter Store, and got pre-qualified, and sure enough they sent me a scooter "no charge." This is a wonderful country! But I was thinkin that I might be able to solve all of my ailments at once. So I made a modification or two on my taxpayer funded scooter from The Scooter Store.

I swear, every time I go to Wal-Mart, or the Boats, or even around the block, every old fart I run into wants to know where I bought my rig. I'm thinkin about trying to work out a deal with The Scooter Store, and Medicare to market this thing. Whata you think?

Love, Clevis