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Golf is a frustrating game to me. I know lots of guys and gals that just love the game, but I just hate doing something that I'm bad at, so I quit playing. I gave it up one afternoon when I drove 12 (count 'em) straight balls into the lake on the 7th at Eastwood. I said to myself, "This is just no fun! I'd rather be at home with my wife and the kids."
My driver is somewhere in the pine trees between the 7th &9th fairways. I started to go look for it, but thought, "nah...screw it!"
Another of our foursome also quit...on the same hole. His drive struck a pine tree, and ricocheted back over our heads, landing about 40 yards behind the tee box. His next shot went into the water. He was not nearly as stubborn as I was, so he quit before he ran out of balls to give away to the other guys that were with us.
We walked off and left the other two REAL golfers to enjoy their afternoon.
There are a zillion funny "golf jokes." Here is a pretty good collection.
In the comments yesterday, Skunks and Cosmic talked about holing birdies and missed eagles...and Staci bragged about her big, thrilling hole-in-one she bagged at a putt-putt one time.
It brought to mind an interview I once saw with the great Willie Nelson...I think it was on 60 Minutes.
Willie is well-known as a smoker of pot, and a lover of golf. Heh! Maybe I could enjoy the game if I were a bit more mellow. But I digress. Willie was on his private golf course, and was about to tee off. The reporter asked him, "Willie, what is par on this hole?" Willie answered, "Well, this is my course, so it's whatever I say it is. Yesterday it was 14. I Birdied The Sucker!"
I would probably play golf every day if I could. And I haven't played in two years. I played a lot with my dad, in fact it was probably the biggest thing he and I had in common. There was probably nothing on earth he loved more than playing golf with his sons. I never beat him, even when he was in his 70s. (Now, he did play just about every day though).
ReplyDeleteI find golf to be a game that teaches me about myself. And sometimes what it teaches me is not something I want to learn, but it humbles me and anyone who knows me knows how much I need humbling.
Here are the things golf has taught me about myself. Some are not very flattering.
1. I don't like failing. No, that's not strong enough. I DETEST failing. Hitting a bad shot just burns me.
2. I have enough of a temper that I have to work to keep it under control. But I am usually able to control it.
3. How easily I lose my temper on the golf course is a fairly reliable indicator of the overall level of stress in my life. However, it's been a long, long time since I've smashed a club into the ground.
4. I'm actually a pretty good golfer. I can usually shoot near a hundred even after not playing for a year. When I played every weekend I was able to get into the 80s with some regularity.
5. The worst part of my game is the "short game" anywhere from about 75 yards from the pin inward. I can usually get closer to the hole from 90 yards using a wedge than I can from 40 yards using any club in my bag. This is a sign that I don't practice or play enough, because the "short game" is all about feel and touch.
6. I can't putt worth a darn. Which is why I don't care much for putt-putt. However, this is also a sign of lack of practice.
7. One of the defining moments in my life was when I realized that playing golf with my dad was not about playing golf, but just about being with my dad. I'm not sure how to explain that, but it was a revelation. Almost like one of those movie moments where a brilliant flash of light strikes the protagonist as he realizes the secret of life. I was probably well into my 30s before this revelation hit me. I am very disappointed with myself that it took me that long to learn.
8. I am an honest person. I don't cheat even when I can get away with it. I would rather shoot an honest 98 than a cheating 89. That helps me sleep at night.
Those are a few of the life lessons golf has taught me. There's a lot more. I could probably even write a book.
Cosmic, that is an excellent comment. I think you've got material there for a book...btw, I'm waiting on my copy of your current one. I'm just saying...
ReplyDeleteKinda like an "Everything I needed to know I learned in Kindergarten" deal. (that's probably not the actual title, but you know what I'm talking about)
I have often thought that I could NOW enjoy playing golf. When I was in my Twenties, I had little patience, and quite a temper. At 50, I've gained ground on those failings.
But I doubt I'll drag the clubs out of storage. I mean, I'd have to go buy a driver... :)