Saturday, October 31, 2009

The first things I thought about when I woke up this Saturday morning...

1) Thank you Lord! Thank you for the good, long night's sleep, and for the sun shining through my window (finally).

2) Cell phones have really changed the world. My little future daughter-in-law left town yesterday for the weekend. I told her, "call me when you get there." She did. Before cell phones, I would have made her tell me the name of the hotel she is staying, the room number, etc. so that I could contact her in an emergency. I don't even know where she's staying. Heck, I don't know for sure that she's in San Antonio. I mean, I know she is, because she's a truthful person...but...well, you know what I mean.

3) Gotta put the flag out, now that the deluge has passed on to points east.

4) I am not making no danged picks on the Saturday games. Because if I pick Georgia, Okie State, and Oregon...I'll surely jinx 'em. I'm just gonna enjoy the games today...no pressure.

5) I'll have to listen to LSU beat the living snot out of Tulane on the radio. No TV when we play the Green Tinkle anymore. (Actually, LSU has terminated the contract with Tulane after about 100 years). This will be the 98th meeting between the two teams, and LSU has won 17 in a row. I can see why it's not on TV.

6) The Mrs. wants to rent some scarry (does scary have two "r's," or one?) movies to watch tonight, while we hide out from the haints! I do not like me no halloweems! I hope she enjoys her movies, as I will be otherwise occupied with pulling for the boys dressed up like cowboys, and ducks.

7) Hmmm...I can see something out of the corner of my eye on the side of my nose. It's crusted blood...wait a minute, lemme go see.............Dangit! The Mrs. must have scratched me with a fingernail last night. ;)

8) Let's see...computer letters...spam, spam, Nigerian Princess, spam, spam, Nigerian Princess, spam, British lottery, spam, spam, prayer request...oh, here's one from Walt..."Obama Jokes"


Bwahahahahahahaha! He's right, the jokes are just average...but the pace car is hilarious!

Obama Jokes

Q: Why does Barack Obama oppose the Second Amendment?
A: It stands between him and the First.

Q: What's the difference between Rahm Emanuel and a carp?
A: One is a scum sucking bottom feeder and the other is a fish.

Q: What's the difference between Greta Van Susteren and Barack Obama?
A: Greta only talks out of one side of her mouth.

Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon?
A: A fund raiser.

Q: What's the difference between Obama's cabinet and a penitentiary?
A: One's full of tax evaders, blackmailers and threats to society. The other is for housing convicts.

Q: What's the difference between a large pizza and the typical Obama backer?
A: The pizza can feed a family of four.

Q: If Pelosi and Obama were in a boat and it started to sink, who would be saved?
A: America !

Q: What's the difference between Obama and Hitler?
A: Hitler wrote his own book.

Q: What's another difference between Obama and Hitler?
A: Hitler actually managed to get the Olympics to come to his country.

Q: Why doesn't Obama pray?
A: It's impossible to read the teleprompter with your eyes closed.

Understanding TV News Acronyms

  • NBC: New Barack Channel
  • ABC: Another Barack Channel
  • MSNBC: My Seriously New Barack Channel
  • CBS: Continuous Barack Show
  • FOX: Flagrant Obama Xenophobes


Well, y'all have a good day...enjoy the games! Go Pokies! Go Ducks! Go Dawgs!

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