"I Went To A Funeral Party, and Everyone Was There!"

(This post is just for me...so I won't forget...or to help me remember...or whatever.)

See? I got a suit on and everything!

(I figured I'd better get a picture of me with a suit on for posterity)

Before we left for the funeral, Pam said, "Oh Andy, you look so nice. It's a shame that somebody had to die for you to get dressed up."

And, she's right. I only wear a suit for funerals, and weddings. (You can fill in the joke there yourself)

By definition, every funeral is "unique." I mean, there's a different bunch of bones in every casket (usually), so every farewell ceremony could be considered unique.

But, I don't think I've been to one that was quite like this one. The funeral was officiated by three Baptist Preachers, and one Roman Catholic Priest. The funeral also featured singing by (at least) 12 singers doing 7 different songs, and an address by one of the dead man's children...and a particularly moving violin solo by a great-nephew (the violinist was probably about 8 years old).

I had told y'all about the death of a Bossier City icon, Joe Cobb. I can not really convey to those of you that didn't grow up around Cobb's Barbecue just how integral a part of my town it was. But, you've likely got a place like that...a place where the rich, the poor, the trash collectors, and bankers sit together enjoying lunch, and working out all the problems of the city...and the world for that matter. Well, that was Joe Cobb's Barbecue.

At the funeral party, the first speaker was Rev. Billy Pierce. He is a life-long local. He shared some funny remembrances of Joe (truthfully, everyone in the joint had funny stories to tell). He especially remembered the time that after many years of Joe ribbing him with "Didn't you teach me when I was in the third grade?" that he replied back, "No, Joe, I didn't teach Special Ed!" That seemed to shut Joe down from ever asking again. (and also brought a big laugh in the church...we're not too pc here. Yet.)

So, let's move on to the Roman Catholic Priest that spoke at Joe's send-off. He was the head of the Catholic Church (Christ The King) for many years in Old Bossier, about two blocks from Joe's Barbecue restaurant.

He was the second man of God to speak (after some beautiful piano music that was played by a niece, and the cute little violinist). He opened his remarks by saying, "When Joe Cobb's obituary came out in the newspaper, my phone began to ring off the hook! Everyone wanted to know 'what in the world are you going to do at a Southern Baptist funeral?' " That brought much laughter from the many hundreds that were assembled.

Then he said, "I told people that I was going to be there anyway, and am honored to be invited to speak...but I'm not sure what I'm going to do!" Then he went on to tell how Joe had welcomed him to Bossier City when he arrived here in the 1970's...how they had become good friends...and how Joe had so often helped him to feed the poor, the indigent, etc. And, he was careful to tell the family just how much he loved their recently departed. It was cool!!!

After Monsignor Carson LaCaze had finished, a daughter of Joe's stepped to the podium. Now, I have seen children of the deceased speak at a funeral before. (I know with all certainty that I could NEVER hold it together at a funeral for either of my parents.) But, one of his two daughters (she's a physician here in the area) addressed the crowd.

Now, The Mrs. is very close to Joe's daughters. They grew up together, and were all fast friends. In fact, one of Joe's daughters was a bridesmaid at our wedding, and the other daughter sang at our wedding...so, they've got history. As a matter of fact, the daughter that spoke is Pam's doctor. (I don't have a doctor, as I do not go to them, and have not been seen by one for over 22 years, but that's another story...).

So, back to Joe's daughter, and what she had to say... As I said, I have seen children speak at the funeral of a parent. But, normally it is "remembrances" of Daddy, stories, etc. But not so. Joe's daughter used her time to thank the community. She said something like, "I want to thank you all for putting up with Daddy. As you all know, he had Alzheimer's. And, we know that it must have been difficult for you all to go down to the restaurant and have Joe ask, 'who are you?' or 'who is your Daddy?,' or 'do I know you?' "

And, she was right. It had gotten to the point that if you went to Cobbs, you really hoped that Joe wasn't there. But, Vicki explained that "Daddy had to have somewhere to GO. And, we are so grateful to you all for being his friend, and visiting him at the Barbecue."

I think we all knew that. But, in some way I'm sure that it was cathartic for Dr. Vicki to thank the crowd.

Heck, we all loved Joe! Everyone that gathered there for his going away party had their own memories. My favorite memories of Joe involved stopping by on a Bossier High School Football Game Friday night to pick up chopped beef sandwiches with my Granddaddy when I was a kid (5 sandwiches for $1)...bringing my own family to his place for food and fun...and then later on, visiting with Joe about why I had stopped eating meat. Oh, man! You shoulda' seen the look on his face, and how he sold me down the country for being a traitor to the cause! That story is too long to tell... And then, the fact that my three oldest sons became "regulars" around Cobb's.

Side note: #3 son became especially endeared to Joe, and his wife, Sue (she runs the cash register at the place)...until he once cracked wise about the potato salad being a little "crunchy." (Phil has a bit of his Daddy in him, and really ticked off Joe!)

Oooooohhhhh.....Joe told him to "hit the door!" That is a favorite memory of #3 son. By the time this happened, Joe could not remember from one day to the next who he was ticked-off at. So, the next day, Phil was welcomed back in the Clan, and served a "Super-Sue PoBoy" and good love by Joe.

Back to the funeral party:

After some more beautiful music, the pastor of First Baptist Church, Bossier made his remarks. Fred Lowery did a pretty good job. He gave his love, and affection to the family. He mentioned that not too long after coming to Bossier City 26 years ago, he was informed that the more Joe Cobb loved you, the harder he would dig you...and that he felt VERY loved. And, he talked about all of the long visits he had with Joe in "The Blue Room." The "Blue Room" is the booth in Cobb's (maybe) 20' x 30' dining room that has a blue seat cover...just so you'll know...

He told a funny story about his last visit with Joe in the ICU at our local big hospital. It's long, so I won't write it all down. But, it ended with him telling about how on the night before Joe died he was very lucid. And when Fred said, "Well Joe, I need to go, and you need some rest. Let's just pray together," Joe said, "I don't need any rest! I'm not tired...but you sure could use the practice praying!" That brought huge laughter from the crowd...because, it was truly JOE!

The Baptist preacher, Fred Lowery, ended up his talk with something I had heard Joe say often, and I'm glad that Fred reminded me of it. (Thanks, Fred!)

"Joe always said that there are only three things that you need to live a happy life. #1...you need to live in Bossier City. #2...you need to attend First Baptist Church. #3...you need to eat a lot of barbecue."

There ya' go...a simple man that left a huge imprint on the life of thousands.

Well, like I said...that was just for me.