Monday, November 15, 2010

The best of seven...

Hey y'all!  Hugs, kisses, yada yad ...well, you know...

I found myself in an odd spot today.  For the first time in I don't know how long, I found myself with nothing to do, and all day to do it in.  So, I said to myself, "Andy, it's time to catch up on all these great blog ideas you've had."  So, I pulled out my tablet on which I write all my great blog ideas, and started to type.  Yes, I really do have a tablet, and a graphite pencil on which I write embryonic blog ideas before I start typing out all this great junk.

I'll swear, I was typing with both hands.  I had seven different ideas I wanted to blog behind....from just how bad the BCS sucks, to the Cam Newton controversy, to how we've gotten dozens of hits in the last few days from people searching for "retard, at least I'm not a nigger" on The Gooble, to how one particular blog buddy (that will remain Innameless) almost wet himself because somebody gave him tickets to watch a bunch of thugs bounce a ball around and prove their gang gayness (and I've got a screen shot of my comment where the word verification was "suction"), to how much it must suck to be a negro in the Democrat Party, to how much it must suck to be Bobby Jindal right now, to how really fabulous this new creation I came up with tastes.

Man, it's good!  It's flour tortillas smeared with The Mrs.' world famous refried beans (leftovers), and shredded cheese, and Hatch green chile sauce, and all stacked on top of each other and baked in the oven at 350 for 20 minutes.

But honestly, once I got finished typing out all those great blog posts I just chunked 'em in to the cyber dumpster.  They suck.  So, let's just go with this...

He talked to The Mrs. last night...

Y'all know that #4 son has some special challenges that the other boys did not.  I mean, other than the shared challenge of having me as a father, #4 has even a bigger hill to climb in many ways.  

I've been so busy for the last many days that I had not taken note until Saturday that he was really on edge.  I mean, I should have noticed earlier (actually I did, but just passed on it) that he was more jumpy than normal, and more out of sorts about things.  Anything.  Everything.

I knew something was building up in him, and on Saturday it finally ignited as he erupted for the first time in a long, long time.  I mean, a really, really, really long time.  It has been several years since he has had a real "meltdown."  Look, I don't want to plague y'all with what it's like when #4 is having a bad day...but it's not pretty to look at.  So, after St. Helens finally calmed down on Saturday, I put him to bed at 10 pm.  I normally let him stay up as late as he wants to on weekends.  He is 14 years old after all, and it's kinda normal for teenagers to stay up late.  He complied easily, and I figured all was better.

On Sunday morning I woke up at 4:30 am to get ready to go to work.  I heard the television running in his room, and figured he'd left it on before falling asleep.  I walked in there and found him fully awake, and watching something on A&E.  I asked him, "Paul, did you go to sleep last night?"  He answered "Tried to."

Well, I had to get on to work, and told him that I'd be home shortly after 2:30 in the afternoon, and that Nick (the young man that lives with us...not one of our sons), and that Ross (#2 son) were around, and if anything went wrong to tell them.  He said, "Yes."

I didn't worry too much about him, as he seemed like his old self, and went on to work.  When I got home all was well, but his countenance was stiffening up big time.  I can tell.  So, I'm racking my brain as to what's up...seriously using every remaining brain cell trying to figure this deal out.  Thanks be to God, Mr. Edison's fabulous invention finally got the switch flipped in my rapidly balding cranium.

I thought, "Andy, you moron!  His whole routine is screwed here...he's uncertain...he's worried...he doesn't KNOW for sure what's up.  All he knows is that his favorite person in the world is not here, and even though she'll be home in a few days, that is like an eternity to a child (and he really is a child...even though he's 14, emotionally he's still...well...not 14)."  So, I talked to him, and it went like this:

Me:  Paul, would you like to call Mom?

Him:  Don't know how to.

Me: Well, if I call her on my phone would you like (there I get cut off)...

Him:  YES!

Me:  (after punching buttons faster than I can remember)  Hi sweetheart!  I've got a young man here that would like to speak to you.

The Mrs.:  Put him on.

Him:  (Fumbling awkwardly with my phone while I try to make sure he gets the phone in the right position to be able to hear, and tell him to "speak up" so that Mom can hear him.) HELLO!

The Mrs.:  saying something I can't hear because I'm not on the phone, Paul is.

Him:  Ha Ha Ha!

The Mrs.:  saying something I can't hear because I'm not on the phone, Paul is.

Him:  Ha Ha Ha!  Really?

The Mrs:  saying something I can't hear because I'm not on the phone, Paul is.


The Mrs.:  saying something I can't hear because I'm not on the phone, Paul is.
Him:  NOT SURE!  (long pause) NOT SURE!

Me:  Here, put the phone closer to your mouth so that Mom can hear you better.

Him:  Not sure.

The Mrs.:  (I don't know what the heck she said, but she talked for a long, long time, and I could see "calm" truly overcome #4 son.  I could see the stiffness in his body just drift away, and a pleasant, pleased look on his face.  All was right with his world)

Him:  I love you too, Mommy.  I love you, Mommy.

Sunday night was a calm one for him.  He hit the sack early, and when I went in to wake him for school this morning, he was sleeping like a baby, with a blissful smile on his lips.

I reckon he misses her as much as I do.


  1. Yeah Jimbo, it was nice. When he handed me the phone back Pam said, "Get the road atlas out and show him where I am, and show him the route I'm coming home on. You know he loves maps."

    She was right. He loves maps.

  2. That was good Andy... I had a box of maps when I was a kid, I'd collect them every summer vacation we went on. I started in 1970 when our family went to South Dakota / Black Hills... loved every moment of it.

    somewhere, I still have that box.

    I never travelled enough to make it worth it to have a giant map on the wall of everywhere I went to. Does #4 son know how far away your boy in Iraq is? It's kind of easier for some to look at it on the wall instead of trying to visualize in their head an abstract notion of "Shitty Town Iraq".

  3. It is obvious that there is someone in the family with special needs, but I am not sure that it is Number Four. Is this the first time Mama went off without taking him?

    At least you figured out how to make that tortilla thing without burning something down.

    I'll be glad when Mrs. Andy gets home and we can stop worrying about you and the boy.

  4. Subtle, TD. No, but the longest time was three days, and he was with his Grandma, which is almost as good.

    Okay, I'll shut up about it now, "friend." She'll be home late this afternoon. I know he'll be REALLY glad to see her.

  5. Bob & Marc, thanks.

    Marc, that's a good idea about the map of hell. I'll show him when Dean gets over there.

  6. That's the sweetest love story I've read in a long while. Thanks for sharing it.

  7. Mother's and sons have such unique relationships. Good story!

  8. Nothing better than MOM... no offense DAD's but MOM's just have that certain,,,,,hmmm,,,,not sure what it's called,,,, they just have it! Thanks for sharing Andy. Paul just needed the reasuurance he wasn't stuck with you and Mom was coming back! :)

  9. Yes, was the reassurance he needed. Just a Mommy's voice, and some "proof" that she's still out there was what he needed.

  10. Dunno how I missed this yesterday, but I did. What Dr. Jill said. And Moogie. And Lou. Moms rock. I still miss mine.


Don't cuss nobody out, okay?