Monday, November 26, 2012

The Mayor will soon be fabulously wealthy! (Even more wealthy than he is now, and ever dreamed he'd be).


Our good buddy, The Mayor (who I have personally virtually known now for about 86 blog years) is fixin' to be fabulously wealthy!

And, that kinda' sucks for us all...because he'll probably resign as Mayor, shut down his blog, and buy Tahiti (or at least 70 or 80 Tahitians to satisfy his every want/desire/whim/whatever).

He's that kind of a guy...

It'll be good for the less fortunate in this world, though.  I have it on good authority that he gives almost 4% of his income to charities (which puts him about 400% ahead of 96% of US Democrats.  And, he's a Canadian, which gives him extra credit, due to the fact that he is taxed by his gubmit even more than we are, and has less to give.  (Most of his charity giving goes to stuff like feeding starving children, saving half-dead/beaten/handicapped seals, and buying (and giving away for a small charge) new "magnetized cause ribbons" that folks stick on they carz.

Them magnetized cause ribbon deals that people stick on they cars do a helluva lot of good for they cause, too!

He's that kind of a guy...

Most of you probably don't know this, but His Honour is a real trendsetter in the blogosphere.  Mitch (not his real name) was the guy who initially conceived "Humpday Hottie."  Really...he was...and we shall forever be in his debt.

He did that probably a million years before anybody else.  Now, hundreds of thousands (if not billions) of bloggers post their "Humpday Hottie" posts on Wednesday, with photos of scantily clad chicks (or just plain nekkid).  Do they ever give The Mayor credit for the idea?  


You might not know it, but he also was the ground-breaker in "Hot, or Not?" (Wherein "stupposedly sexy" celebrities are lampooned, and given their comeuppance).  That one has been copied by several thousand bloggers.  Do they ever give His Honour, The Mayour the credit?


And, one of my most favorite trends he started several years ago is "MENSA Friday," wherein he poses questions posed to MENSA candidates, to see how good you can do at it.  I don't usually do all that good, but occasionally I will copy and paste answers from commentors that have commented before I did, and I'll get 'em right.  

(One of the highest honors honours I've had as a blogger was to be allowed to pinch hit for The Mayor one summer doing the MENSA Friday deal when The Mayor was intellectually spent, and needed a break.  It wore me out, too.  But, doing your part for the cause is what life is all about.  I guess).

To be honest, that trend hasn't caught on real good yet.

But, I'm sure it will.

Will they give His Honour the credit when it does?


But, one thing The Mayor learned early on is how to profit from his creativity.  Eons ago, he started using "targeted ads" in his sidebar.  And, I know for a fact that they have served him well.  I hear tell that he bought his current fleet of armored SUV's from the targeted ads alongside one post he did about Michelle Obama right before the Inauguration of her husband in 2009.  If memory serves, he referred to Michelle as a "howler monkey."  (Don't quote could have been "Future First Lady.")  

Regardless, in his sidebar appeared a click-through advertisement where you could buy "The Michelle Obama Inaugural Ball Princess Figureeeeeeem."  (It was porcelain, too).  I think it was ONLY $39.95 (USD), and the click-throughs went through the roof!  The Mayor really cashed in on that one.

He's that kind of a guy...

Anyway...I was looking at the Mayor's blog today, just breathlessly awaiting one of his lesser known, trend-setting, regular (somewhat's been a coon's age since he posted one) features, "Piece Of Art, Or Piece of Shit?"  (POAOPOS in worldwide computer shorthand).  

Sure enough, he done one!

I was proud.

When I clicked on the POA or POS post, I was astounded!  His Honour, The Mayour has finally hit the big 22 on the roulette wheel with all his chips on 22.  (Okay...I'm faking/reaching/hoping here...not sure a roulette wheel has a #22...regardless, he's gonna get rich and buy him lots of Tahitians).  

(click it)  


Dang!  The Mayor's click-through sidebar has covered just about everything.  It tells you a link where you can find a piece of art, or a piece of shit at MonsterMarketplace...or you can get "answers" about "Piece Art piece shit" at www.Answered-....and it looks like that same "answered" dealie can even help you find a piece of art or shit "near you!"

What could be better?  I mean, a local POS that you probably never would have knowed about had it not been for them targeted ads!!!

His Honour, The Mayour is gonna get filthy, stinkin' rich on this one.  I just know it.

The good thing is that he likes me.  I think.  And, he might let me ride herd on his newly acquired Tahiti folks!

That would be a bitchin' job!  And, I could use it, seein' as Santa Clause is comin' to town.

And, pretty soon, too.  (Unless The Mayans were right)

So, y'all need to mosey on over there, and click on them sidebar ads big-time...maybe four or five thousand times...if you've got nothing better to do.  

And, I know you don't.  It's Monday night.  Go click through, and find more info on pieces or art, or pieces of shit (POAOPOS) in your area.  

Do it for the chirrens!


  1. Fantastic use of the letter *U* in words that you don't usually use them in. Good job "Canadianizing" yourself up.

    You shall be rewarded.

    Andy, by far this is the greatest post ever in the history of the internet.

    When The Mayor posts, "What's In The Mayor's Lunch?" later this week, you're going to win, regardless what you guess.

    1. BTW...I'm not playing "What's In The Mayor's Lunch?" this year.

      It's a Mayan tradition to skip playing it in 2012. It's in hidden code on their Calendar to not play that game in 2012. It's true. I heard at least four callers to "Coast To Coast AM" in the last few weeks say the same dang thing about it.

      That's the god's honest truth, too!

      Just sayin'...

  2. We've suspected that the game was made for "What's in the Mayor's Lunch" for quite some time.

    I like how Microsoft underlines my words that I sometimes accidentally still spell with a stupid "u" in the middle of them. It's like Microsoft is saying something about u's when I know it's just because they're happy.


  3. And, I know you don't. It's Monday night.

    Wrong. It's Tuesday mornin' and I DO have better thangs to do. Mebbe later.

  4. There you go, Andruw...a little suck up and you win on the Mayor's site regardless of what you do ;-)

    1. Damn right...I'm angling for that Overlord of The Tahitians deal...

    2. ...shameless, Andy.

  5. This man is a truly one of the great thinkers of our time. I am very happy that you made us aware of this genius and the work that he is doing to benefit all mankind. I am most interested in acquiring one of the Michelle Obama dolls if there are any left. I am such a fan of Michelle and Barry.


Don't cuss nobody out, okay?