What idiot came up with "lightning doesn't strike twice in the same place?"
If you'll remember, The Mrs. got ripped off just a little over a year ago. Yep, on the Saturday afternoon that we were gone to #3 son's high school graduation, some piece of doo doo went in the garage and stole all of her man tools.
Well, it has happened again, and this time I bear part of the blame. Part. I had borrowed her new Poulan lawnmower (which has been prominently featured and discussed on this blog) to cut a little more grass. It looked like rain was coming, so I figured I'd try to beat it.
I got our front yard, and the neighbor's front yard cut. And I still had time to finish the back yards, but I was wearing down, and supper was almost ready. So, I pushed her new mower into the back yard and left it under the covered patio instead of putting it up in the shop. What's the difference? I mean, it's in the back yard where nobody can see it anyway. And we have Sadie, the most ferocious piece of watchdog in the history of blind, deaf, useless canines. (She ain't really blind and deaf...1 out of 3 ain't bad I reckon).
Well, when I walked out back this morning to feed Sadie...no mower. Some time last night somebody came in my back yard and stole the darn thing. Again. It's like some kind of nightmare or something. It's like the devil is trying to prevent me and The Mrs. from being good citizens of the neighborhood or something.
But he will not win! We will prevail in the struggle! Go Tigers!
I asked Sadie what happened to the mower. She just kinda stood there looking stupid, and wagging her tail. Then she laid down in the grass and rolled over belly up in the air for me to pet her.
Ignorant dog. She probably held the gate open for the thief on his way out.
Well, I am not going to let this ruin my Sunday. Going to Momma and Daddy's for lunch to celebrate mine, and my older sister's birthdays. I am gonna drown my sorrows in some good family fellowship, food, and birthday cake.
Y'all have a good one. It's Sunday, so don't cuss at anybody or nothing.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
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Happy birthday.
ReplyDeleteDude, someone stole the mowering device from off your patio and the dog didn't go nuts? That is confusing.
ReplyDeleteAre you not going to take the fam to Shoney's breakfast buffet?
Happy Birthdays to you and your family, Old Person that cannot hear a thief on your patio.
Pat and Paul, thank you very much. My birthday is not until Saturday, but big Sis had hers a few days ago, so it's a joint celebration.
ReplyDeleteAnd Paul, your last comment is more true than you know. Sigh...
Paul, by the way, Sadie is truly useless as a watchdog. She is like a good salesman...never met a stranger.
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday, Andy :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Nancy. I'm planning on it. My birthday is the opening Saturday of college football season. I have given strict instructions to everyone to leave me alone ALL DAY as my gift.
ReplyDeleteAndy,
ReplyDeleteWho would look in your back yard? Only folks going to and fro the apartments... My money is on being robbed by them or their friends...
Such a shame that we stoop to stealing lawn mowers. Back in the day we usually got hit up for money, or a watch or something that could easily be fenced. A lawnmower?! That may be the unkindest cut. (Pun intended.)
Another idea...
ReplyDeletePost a warning, but you will probably get sued anyway. (But then, these days someone that steals your mower and then cuts off a toe would probably come back and sue you anyway...)
Here's the idea, plug the mower in for the night. 110 volts coursing through the handle should make it real interesting when someone grabs it during the night.
Yeah Walt, that was my thought exactly. There was a guy here replacing some flooring in one of the apartments Saturday.
ReplyDeleteHe and I actually talked about how much grass each of us had to cut this year. He's the only stranger that has been on the place in weeks, and from where he is working it's possible that he could have seen it sitting out...I am going to check into it Monday.
As to the wired lawnmower, Daddy had another idea. He thought we ought to chain Sadie to the next mower on a padlocked chain. That way they would have to take her, too. A true deterrent.
I swear, she's beautiful and sweet, but she don't know "COME" from "SICK 'EM!"
What! your mower got stolen?...and yer complain'?...there's one less rotten job and now you'll probably get a lousy mower for your B-Day...good grief man, if you didn't have shitty luck you'd have no luck...heh heh.
ReplyDeleteCudgel, thank you for setting me straight. Sometimes it's hard to look at the bright side of things when you feel like a victim.
ReplyDelete