Tuesday, November 1, 2011

It must be "PICTURE DAY!"

.


I swear, from the time that I was about 11 years old through my Senior Year in High School, it NEVER failed.  On "picture day," I would wake up and discover an enormous zit on my face.


I mean...massive!

Sometimes it would be above one eye or the other.  Most often it would be on my left cheek.  Heck, one year it surfaced as a "cyclops" kinda deal right between my eyes.  I think I was a sophomore.  Not sure.


Now, I'm not just talking your normal, run of the mill zit.  No, "picture day zit" would always be one of those "quarter-sized" deals that was real red around the edges, and all swelled up and puffy-white in the middle.  I mean, the kind of zit that made it look like you were really trying hard to have one.

And, I learned pretty quick that if you tried to squeeze "picture day zit," it only got bigger, and redder, and more grotesque to the naked eye (and camera lens).


It's true.  Every stinkin' yearbook picture of me sports "picture day zit."   

Sometimes, just for kicks, The Mrs. will pull out my old yearbooks...she'll thumb through, and yell out (while laughing hysterically), "Hey Andy!  Come look at 'zit-boy'!!!"


It's reeeeel funny!


Well, dangit!  This morning I woke up and was forced to look at "picture day zit" once again.  Really.


52 stinkin' years old, and "picture day zit" comes back to screw with me again!


Crud.


And, good ol' "picture day zit" just happens to have made it's home right on the bridge of my nose.  Jeepers!  The most prominent, attention-getting, ugly part of my face...my big old ugly nose...


Crud.


I swear...I just know that when I get to work, and open up my intranet e-mail there's gonna be some surprise announcement about a new "company pictorial directory," and I'll be required to show up and get my picture struck for it today.

I just know it...


I might call in sick.


Naw.  That would be the pansy way out.  Plus, it's probably not gonna happen.  But, I'm still gonna look retarded walking around with this big old zit on my big old ugly nose.


Crud...


52 stinkin' years old.  With a big old zit on my big old ugly nose.


Crud...


52!  Stinkin'!  Years!  Old!


with a picture day zit...


crud.

Zit-boy.

9 comments:

  1. You get to a certain age and start losing your hair. It is just not fair that you would still get zits, too.

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  2. 52 stinkin' years old. With a big old zit on my big old ugly nose. Must be starting to go through 'the change'. Nyuk.

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  3. Zit-boy. I'll remember that one . .

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  4. 52 stinkin' years old. With a big old zit on my big old ugly nose.

    Don't feel like the Lone Ranger, this was me, too. I have semi-good news for ya though: I haven't had one of those zits for over five years now. It must have sumthin' to do with turnin' 60. You have that to look forward to.

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  5. Lou, ain't it the truth! Sucks...

    Deb, yeah, nyuk. Sigh. Hey, you might be right.

    Jim, I am SURE that you will. Ya' know what they say about elephants & Benton bloggers...

    Buck...well...yeah, there's at least that. Sigh.

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  6. Andy, I wasn't gonna say it....but....What the heck....
    I can think of much worse places to have a zit!!
    When you're 52 like we are, there are much worse places! Besides, a little neosporin, a really close shave and it'll go away. Plus, who do you have to really impress besides Mrs Andy anyway? Have a good one, Brother!!

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  7. We called you Zit Boy behind your back in high school. OK...not really, but we should have... ;)

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  8. Paul, don't try to make me feel better about "Picture Day Zit." You're a good man, but it will not work.

    Moogie, sigh...

    Dadman, I always knew it. I just didn't let on. You can try to soften the harsh reality with a "not really, but we should have."

    But, I KNEW.

    Jeepers...zit boy...

    again

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Don't cuss nobody out, okay?