Friday, December 16, 2011

Trust me, you'll tell this one to someone today...


Our good buddy, and regular contributor, Paul the Fireguy sends this one along.  (I modified it slightly)

 A small zoo in Alabama obtained a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle.  Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in heat.

To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available. Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Bobby Lee Walton, a redneck part-time worker (and HUGE Crimson Tide fan) responsible for cleaning the animal cages.  Bobby Lee, like most rednecks, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species.

The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Bobby Lee was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00?

Bobby Lee showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully.  The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under five conditions:

"First", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips."  The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

"Second", he said, "She must wear a 'Dale Earnhardt Forever' T-Shirt, and a 'Bama ball cap."  The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

"Third", he said, "you can't never tell nobody about this."  The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

 "Fourth", Bobby Lee said, "I want all the children raised Southern Baptist.”  Once again it was agreed.

"And last," Bobby Lee said, "I'll need another week to come up with the $500.00.”


  1. Andy, Joyce and I are crying here. That was funny. Thanks for starting our day off with a great laugh!

  2. Heh. No, wait. BWAAA-HAHAHAHA!

  3. Good 'ol Bama!
    What more can you say!!!

  4. Sounds like several people I work with...


Don't cuss nobody out, okay?